Gratitude - day 1

When I am feeling frustrated, short changed, insufficient or victomized, I have a wise friend who reminds me that you can't feel self pity and gratitude at the same time. She has suggested on many, many occasions that the best way to combat feelings of resentment, jealousy, disappointment, inadequacy and sadness is to make a gratitude list. Her Rx for a "spell" of bad feelings (lasting more than a few days) is to make a gratitude list of 20 things everyday for a week. You are not to duplicate things you are grateful for, and in my practice, I try not to make a list of specific people because it prevents me from digging deep. My WASSIMA gals and I decided we were going to do a week together. Some of us were feeling low, others just liked the idea of it and I think it is a great way to go into November, which holds Thanksgiving and to officially kick off the Holiday Season. So here is Day 1:

1. deep belly laughter that makes your cheeks hurt and heeps creeping back long after the funny has ended.
2. To have born in a time where a woman and an African American competed for a party nomination for a Presidential election.
3. Spell check
4. 400 thread count sheets
5. my education
6. that my husband still tells me I am beautiful everyday
7. I have my sight
8. I was able to go trick or treating and walk to school by myself when I was a kid
9. Digital Cameras
10. for the roof over my head
11. My creativity
12. I have such a great relationship with my mother
13. to be a parent
    
14. I am teachable
15. for all the people who have dedicated their lives to educating te public and changing the course of global warming
16. the Television program, Lost
    
17. tat most of the time I have faith that everything is going to be OK
18. love
19. that I am a free and a citizen of the USA
20. I have a loving relationship with a God of my understanding

Wow, my heart is swollen with blessings. i can't wait until tomorrow.

More Artful Living

I'm finally up and around after being wretchedly sick for a week. I completely lost my voice and I cannot tell you how frustrated I was. How in the world do you get a 5 1/2 and 3 year old ready for school when you can't talk? Especially when your throat is sore and your body is aching. I was not in the best of spirits but, like all toil, good came from it.

Coming out of my silence and discomfort gifted me an appreciation for this very moment. I am powerless over the economy, the laundry pile that never stops growing, my newly sprouted gray hairs and the leaves that keep falling from the trees in our yard. I can do this or that to deal with these things but I do not have the power within my body to make these things be anything different than they are so why do I spend so much time feeling worried, ashamed or guilty about them? In other words, it is time to lighten up.


Planning is way over rated and is contrary to the kind of person I want to be. You can invest for your future and still end up broke. You can eat right and exercise but you are still going to get old. You can wash clothes every day and you'll still never be done. Living in the moment means that you make a CHOICE to do things that make you happy or unhappy. If they make you unhappy but need to be taken care of (we all have to file our taxes) then make the choice to change your mindset... be in charge of your perspective and get it done.

Most of all be grateful. We are all blessed - each and everyone of us. It is not our job to count OTHERS blessings, just our own. Its not a race, a contest nor are we being graded. This is life. We eat, we drink, we sleep, we breath, we go potty and everything else is human-made. It is all just a backdrop, props, dialog, feelings, perspectives, experiences, memories. I find that when I whittle my life down to the bare bones, I become one of many, a human among humans and I get my power back. My power to be happy. My power to pursue things that I love. My power to make decisions- not because I have to but because I GET to (unlike so many in other parts of the world). I see things more clearly and appreciate the beauty of my lawn covered with reds, oranges and browns. What my neighbors think about my front yard does not even enter my mind. I see my kids as playful, innocent, curious little people and I am able to explore with them instead of ordering them to stay put and worrying how their behavior reflects on me. It is when I am in this place that I feel a warmth in my heart which I believe to be a connection with God - the Universe, Buddha, whatever spirit, power or energy source you know. It is the most amazing feeling to be united with this source of love and today, I am making the conscious choice to be connected.

That being said, here is what I've been up to...


I am nearly finished with my torso. I need to make a couple of adjustments to the value transitions but I have to say that I had a fabulous time doing this and have decided to persue Fine Art rather than Graphic Design. It just happened one day - I knew that I was meant to go down that path and I feel so light and centered about it!


I finished a heap of UGRA projects so I could hand them off at the last UGRA play date which was a BLAST. Many, many thanks to Sharla for her gracious hospitality and for the incredible projects.


We made a Halloween accordian album from CD sleeves and a handmade book of 6 signatures in just a few hours. There were 6 totally fabulous atist in attendance and I soaked up all of the creative energy like a dyhydrated sponge. By the time I left I was dripping with inspiration.



I've also been busy with one of my clients albums which is turning out to be so wonderful. I'm really pleased and can't wait to show her the most recent pages. While the administrative part of our life feels daunting, we, our family is just doing great. It takes up every moment of every day but we choose to live our life that way and we are really happy.

Self Exploration through Art

I know that title sounds deep but I am not referring to anything profound when I make that statement I just wanted an intriguing introduction before I went on to share what I recently discovered through my classes, projects and my creative voice.

For the past 2 weeks, we've been working on drapery which is even harder than it looks, yet it is a hypnotic experience when you get into the zone. I found myself eager to delve in, ready for the challenge but as the folds began to run in to each other I became confused and I stopped "feeling" the drawing. Always a problem solver, I decided to post stickys on each of the folds with a number so I could keep track of their flow into one another. When I finished, you could no longer see the fabric because the stickys where everywhere plus they left their own shadows which messed with my blending... ARGHHHHHH! The methodical logic that served me well writing term papers and managing business accounts was not the correct approach for this assignment. No- I had to become more invested in the fabric, the movement, the relationships between light and darkness scattered about. I had to SEE more. When I began to do this, I fell into a trance like state - it was most definitely meditative in nature. Time stood still, my hands and brain worked together to create something that my inner voice knew little about. It isn't a masterpiece by any means but guess what? I did something that I did not believe I could do and that is a priceless feeling.

My Graphic Design class has become challenging too. Last week we had to draw typeset with colored pencils in preselected fonts for a Olive Oil label we are mocking up. It is tracing right? Not as easy as it seems my friend. They expect the finished product to look like it was printed off of the computer. This taught me so much about using colored pencils in hard and soft lead. I never realized that handling these simple instruments would require so much practice.


This week we had to create 20 logo images based on 5 different concepts. This was also an incredible learning experience because we did some visual brainstorming which caused me to use that same part of my brain that I used when I did my drapery. It is a wonderful feeling to spend access my right brain for long, uninterrupted periods of time while simultaneously using my left brain to remain focused on my concept. Rarely do my right and left brain spend time together in this way. I was really pleased with my work - obviously, some are better than others, but I gave the assignment everything I had. Last night as I looked over the finished work I felt like a true artist for the first time.

Life in the fast lane

Boy, September really shifted our gears from 4th to 5th. We have been BUSY! I am in awe of parents around the world and all they have to juggle to get kids to school, keep up a home and family schedule plus workHow in the world do they find time for social activities, nurturing their marriage, exercise and any sort of hobby or passion? Of course I said the same sort of thing after the birth of my first child and again when we had a second, and several more times since then and I know it will all come together in due time (about 5 minutes before the next big change :D)

So here is life in a nutshell - I'm juggling 3 clients right now which is awesome but challenging and totally necessary since Tim has not worked but a couple weeks since July. This housing market crisis effects the economy beyond the banking industry and realtor commissions. He is an electrician and there just isn't anything being built. The Union hall is filled with guys trying to figure out how they are going to put food on the table for their families. It is scary stuff and I have to admit I feel utterly powerless. I try to focus on the good stuff though - like the fact that Tim has been able to take on so many of the house manager responsibilities I usually do and he's been taking and picking up the kids from school. He has taken a huge chunk of the life stuff off of my plate which has given me time to provide my clients with great work and allowed me to focus on school which is sooooooooooooo much more challenging than I imagined. I hate cubes.

I am an "A" student. I just am. I get A's because I work hard and have good study habits but in Art those traits aren't enough. So I'm into my 4th week and I've gotten marks that were NOT A's. And on assignments that I really worked hard on. I mean over the top, totally invested kind of work.

So I'm learning something about humility from a lot of different areas of my life and I feel clumsy.

On a lighter note, this month has been filled with celebration, expanded horizons and artful fellowship. A few weeks ago we clebrated Eva's third bithday with a fairy princess tea party. It was a magical day - one I'll treasure and I'm hoping she'll be able to cherish some of the memories too.


I also went on a women's retreat to a native american sweat lodge which was remarkable. My dear friend Michele treated me to this incredible experience and I am so very grateful to her. While I don't subscribe to all of the beliefs and practices, I found many gifts that I really needed at this time in my life. The most amazing was meeting my spirit guide - a big black bear who does not have the answers nor does he lead me one way or another. He is just with me and I take comfort in that image. I was with two of my best friends and the other attendees were also remarkable women so I was nestled in a safe and loveing environment, away from my responsibilities allowing me to get reaquainted with my authentic self. It can often get masked by expectations, obligations and other's needs, but without my connection to my auhentic self I rob my children of the gifts I can offer them, I rob those close to me of what God intended me to share with them, I rob my art of my true voice and most of all, I cheat myself from having the experiences I am meant to have.

I also had a WONDERFUL playdate with several of my fellow UgRA-ites.



I hostessed the soire at my house and we worked on a project called "my perfect day" it was a delight to spend time in the studio with these amazingly accomplished artists and to explore what a perfect day REALLY looks like. The project was a bit "ambitious" for an afternoon but we all agreed that working on it from home would be a pleasant chore.
I am desperately trying to find a way to get to Donna Downey's Inspired next May. There is absolutely no money for this (not even the payment plan) but I cannot image not going so I am putting it out there in the Universe hoping that the airfare to N. Carolina, the hotel costs and the workshop fees won't be an obsticle. Please let me know if you have any ideas on how i make this happen. Last April's workshop changed me as an artist and a person. It is a remarkable program and I HAVE TO FIND A WAY TO ATTEND! :D - Any ideas? Please send them my way.

That is all for now my friends! Wishing you well on your journey.

Swaps, Back to School and workspace organization

I cannot believe it is September...thank God. When I was a kid, summer meant freedom, adventure and fun in the sun. As an adult, it meant keeping the kids busy so they don't fight, layers and layers of sunblock and hot, hot evenings with nothing but fans, open windows and the neighbors barking dog. Fall brings cool breezes, changing colors and lots of structure which is really important to everyone in my home.


I just finished making ATC cards for another UGRA swap. This time we only had to make 10 copies of one design. The theme was "In the Garden". I toiled over this because I had recently did a set of garden pages in an explosion book UGRA project so I wanted to do something different. I finally committed to the above design after many experiments. Sometimes I just don't feel the creative spark you know? As I look at the cards now, I wonder if I need to play with them a little more. Maybe some clouds??

I also finished my music mix for the WASSIMA CD Scavenger hunt SWAP.

We needed to make a mix CD that had songs for at least 15 of the following categories:

1 A song from the year you were born

2 A song with a one word title

3 A song with a number in the title

4 A silly song

5 A song that makes you cry

6 A song that makes you laugh

7 A song that makes you want to dance

8 A song that describes one of your philosophies of life

9 A good wake-up song

10 A song sung by or about children

11 A song you relate to someone you love

12 A holiday song. Any holiday.

13 A song from a movie or play

14 An instrumental

15 A song about a season

16 A naughty song (interpret as you will)

17 A song about a place far away from you

18 A song from another culture

19 A song about an animal or other creature besides people

20 A song that makes you wonder why it was ever recorded

21 A song that commonly gets stuck in your head

22 A song that gets you feeling romantic. Define romantic as you will.

23 A song that gets you worked up about something

24 A song that gets you daydreaming

25 A song about a place

I wanted to create a playlist to post on my blog but most of the songs are not available on Deezer yet.


In other news.... Aidan started Kindergarten last Thursday! I was one of those magical memories that I'll treasure for the rest of my life. I couldn't have been more proud of him or more grateful to St. Timothy's for the amazing program they provide for the kids.
Eva starts preschool at St. Tim's tomorrow but had her orientation last Thursday. She was so excited to be there and was crushed when it was time to go home.


These are the experiences that make life's struggles worth the trouble. I could never have imagined the gamete of joyous feelings that come from watching my children grow up.

I also start school tomorrow so my husband, Tim, has helped me transform my workspace from the mess it was into a student's dream! What a nice honey he is!

He installed peg board so I can keep all my tools out in the open and I moved a bunch of my scrapbooking supplies into the studio (which is an absolute disaster I might add).

My materials arrived last week from Ulrecht which was such a treat. I've got my art board covered and my charcoal sharpened so I'm totally ready to dive into learning!

I've been very busy with my client's project. I've spent the last couple of weeks in Europe - not really- but through scanning in her slides from a childhood trip, I feel as though I've just taken a time machine to visit Florence and Rome and in about 30 minutes, I'll be off to Venice, 1976. I also have a new client I may start working with very soon. I just love my job and the incredible people I get to work with. It is such an honor to help celebrate their life memories through archiving and scrapbooking their photos and memorabilia.

Well that is it for now friends...
...more to come...
...Happy September!

It's official!

I'm going back to school at the Academy of Art University. for a second BA. I couldn't be more excited. I start in two weeks. I'll be taking my classes online so I can still do the mom thing and continue working from home. Everything fell into place to easily and quickly, it just blows my mind. I'm currently enrolled under Illustration, Graphic Arts but the pure Graphic Arts program looks super appealing - I am also dying to take a half a dozen classes in Fine Arts including a book making class and jewelry making! I wish I could go to school forever!

Yesterday, I ordered my class supplies from Utrecht Art. The class materials list is already in the Utrecht system so you don't have to hunt around for everything. I checked over at Dick Blick just to see if the prices where OK and surprisingly, they were comparable or less with the AAU student discount and the awesome Fall sale they have going on right now. I am SOOOOOOOO excited to get everything! I was "required" to order some items that I have been coveting for months. Prismacolor Premiers and Verithins pencils. and Caran d' Ache NEOCOLOR II Watersoluble pastels.
I am enrolled in 2 classes- Analysis of Form and Materials, Tools and Comping Techniques. They sent me a stack of DVD's which include all of my tutorials. I watched a few Modules and the projects look so fun! I am feeling a whole lot of gratitude right now (and a chunk of fear too - you know -the whole "what if?" song and dance.) My husband has been incredibly supportive, as has my family and friends.

On another note, both of my kids will be starting school in the next couple of weeks. Aidan is going to Kindergarten and Eva starts preschool. There are no more babies in our house. I'm grateful that the diapers are a thing of the past, but I miss the baby smell (and the lack of the word "no!") Lots of exciting things on the horizon. The trick is enjoying it.

An Artful Day

My house is a mess but I had an amazing Saturday making art. My dear friend, Miss Maggie (back from a 5 week holiday) came over and we spent the entire afternoon in the studio. Since neither of us had finished our Organic Background projects from our class with Paulette Insall last May, we decided to tackle the daunting task. We both loved the class but with each layer, we became less pleased with our projects. I imagine part of the problem was that, compared to Paulette's example piece, ours were a lot more "chaotic". Anyhow, on the last lesson we were supposed to add a focal point but neither of us could commit to an image so our paintings sat in the studio all summer - half naked.

Yesterday, we decided to shed our expectations and inhibitions and just do whatever we felt like doing while catching up on the details of summer. It was really wonderful! By the end of the day we had all 3 kids in the studio with us. They were painting clay beads we had made a few months earlier while Maggie and I transformed our pieces into something we could connect with.


I found a captivating picture of Yosemite in a 1936 Sunset magazine that I cut out and adhered to the right side with matte medium. I found another picture in a 1952 issue of National Geographic that I adhered to the left. I connected the two with acrylic paint and pen I covered the pink and green base I had created in the class with layers of blue, white, pink and purple, using the spray bottle technique with each layer to achieve some dimension and movement. I left the clouds make from sheet music alone since they worked with my over all design. I then found an old image of a small plane and a horse which I adhered with matte gel. I added photos of my family to give the collage life. Maggie was embossing right next to me and some of the opalescent embossing powder floated onto my picture. This was the perfect finishing touch. The end result was NOTHING like I expected nor what we learned in class, but I connected with the piece which is what I feel an artist needs to do to feel really satisfied with their work. Just my humble opinion.


Later in the evening, I finished my UGRA meet-up invites using the papers I made the night before. I covered postcard sized junk mail with several coats of gesso on each size. while they were drying, I cut the pages I had made the evening before into 3 x 2 squares. I adhered four squares to each post card then stamped and embossed UGRA across the front. I love the urban edge of these.

Background Technique

I'm hostessing an UGRA gathering in September. I'll be leading a project for some really amazing artist, so I've been working on the invitations to start things off right. Last night I pulled out some watercolor paper and started playing
I combined a number of techniques to achieve the final look. The first was a background technique I stumbled onto at Technique Tuesday:

Materials List:

• Canvas, or Watercolor Paper
• White Gesso
• 3 Acrylic Paint Colors
• Paint Tray or Wells
• Spray Bottle w/Water
• 2” Bristle Brush
• Assorted Script and/or Design Rubber Stamps
• Heat Gun (Optional)
  

Prep:

• Water down the acrylic paints: approx. 1 part paint, to 3 parts water.
• Set your darkest paint color aside, do not use it until step 4.
  

(Note: I use inexpensive acrylic craft paints that have been watered down to about 1 part paint to 3 parts water. Once I have nearly empty bottles, I just add water to the bottle and shake it up. If you're starting with a fresh bottle and there is obviously no room for water, use a watercolor pan and put a pea sized blob of paint in a paint well and then add water. For those of you who are thrifty...this makes a bottle of paint last a LONG time!!)

Let’s Play!:

1. Give your canvas a generous coat of white gesso. Allow to dry. (Note: I speed dry this with my heat gun or a hairdryer)
2. Give the canvas (or paper) a wash with a single color of paint. (Note: I start with a wash of yellow because it is a light- you should start with the lightest color in your palette and work towards the darkest). Allow to dry.
   
3. Brush a second color of paint around the edges of the canvas. Do not cover the entire canvas, leave some of the base color peeking through. Allow to dry. (Note: Cheap brushes are great for this because they give texture to the thinned paint)
4. Apply a thin layer of your darkest color over the entire canvas. DO NOT DRY THIS!!! Using the water bottle, spritz over portions of your canvas. Let the water sit for a few minutes, then blot off the excess paint.
5. Brush your favorite rubber stamps with a layer of gesso and randomly stamp it on the canvas. Allow to dry.
6. Choose one of your 3 paint colors, and brush a light wash of it over your stamping. (Note: If you’d like the stamping to stand out more, then skip this step and leave it white.)
   

Paulette Install also taught this method in her Organic Backgrounds class with some variation. The effect is really unique. After I did steps 1 thru 4, I played with some more paint. I added additional layers of color and repeated step 4 over and over again. Once I worked my background to the pattern and colors I wanted, I stamped with gesso but I did it differently with each piece.

On one , I stamped an angel image all over the page and after a few moments, wiped the images to give them a ghostly look. Then I did step six. This was my husbands favorite piece.

On another, I stamped a paisley image all over the page and let it dry. Then I cut up bits of fibers and sprinkled them around the page. I melted white candle wax and dripped it on top of the fibers to adhere them. I dripped additional puddles of wax and sprinkled lime glitter over them. I love the texture!
With the 3rd page, I used the paisley stamp again but I poured a glitter embossing powder on top and then hit it with the heat gun. I LOVE this page - the glitter plays off the assorted colors and gives the page a lot of movement. (photo at the top of the page)

These are the paper towels I used to blot the excess paint after spritzing. Aren't they pretty? I use Viva which are super strong. I will try to think of some way to use these in some other project.

I will be cutting these pages into squares and mounting them onto recycled junk mail for the UGRA invites. I'll post the finished card when it is done!

I've finished a few UGRA projects lately. Here are some pics of the overall project, some of the other artist's and my contributions.

This project is entitled "It's my story and I'm sticking with it" - each person creates a mini album with their story and a visual depiction to follow.

The pieces above and below were the work of a very talented artist in UGRA. She is amazing!

The pics below are of my entry...

The project below is a garden themed explosion book. It was such a FUN project to work on because I've seen the recipients garden and it is truly an oasis.