I am jazzed about 2009. I can feel the tingle of a kind of emotional molting. There are times when I WANT TO LET GO of the toxic feelings and beliefs that I accumulate over time but just WANTING to do something does not make it so. Today, i feel the RELEASE. It is as if a giant bird swept down and took my load right off of my shoulders. Of course I still have my habitual worries, issues, denial but I can navigate that stuff much easier now that I am not weighted down with all the waste of yesterday. Today, I walk with just the clothes on my back (OK, I am probably carrying a big purse with a few bits of "blah" I picked up over the weekend). I'm not sure if my metaphors are serving my point but as I write this I can see in my mind's eye what I feel in my heart which is a great way to BE.
We have been purging our garage and closets getting rid of the "things" that take up space. Each time I find something and think "but I might need this someday" I remember that I always have everything I need and that the most important thing to be prepared for is now. In my opinion, too much stuff gets in the way of now. Each "thing" is just one more thing to think about.
We had a garage sale this last weekend. It was a fabulous family activity and the weather was beautiful - FREEZING, but beautiful. I did not realize how vitamin B and K deprived I was until I was outside all weekend. I felt the sunlight feed my body. It was fun chatting with our neighbors and giving people incredible bargains. We were practically giving this stuff away. I love a great deal so I feel it is my duty to give great deals too. It can light up a person's day.
The kids went back to school yesterday and I cannot tell you how grateful I am to get back to our routine. We all do better when we are on a schedule. Tim has Monday's off due to this crappy housing market so he and I spent the day taking care of the business of life and it was a delight. The beauty of marriage is that you share a life and just being together in the quiet tasks can be remarkably intimate and comforting. I love that the little things have become my greatest joys.
Wow - 2009. I hope my BE way of living stays with me. It is an open door, an open heart, acceptance, trust, love, truth, safety, now, and mine, if I allow it.